And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
