Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
