Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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