i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
