yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
