So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
she looked like the before picture.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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