I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize