He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
