the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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