He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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