I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
My liver just had a heart attack.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
