Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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