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P.S. I can't hear my feet
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
