Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
