Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
The Olympian is in my bed
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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