do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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