your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize