Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Randomize
