Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
