Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
