I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
