I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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