Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
