So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
