we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
