we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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