I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
