So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
