it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
