ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
