when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
