you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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