I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
All the doctor said was why
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
