Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
