Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
