dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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