Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
