i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
