I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
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