Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
