You made me cry and you don't even care
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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