His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
You smell like stripper and shame
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize