Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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