meet me or not, i'm out of control
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
