I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I understand Curling. That high.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
