Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
