do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
