my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
