For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
