She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I fill condoms, not promises.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
