So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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