i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
foreskin is a definite game changer
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
